~Uruha’s POV~

            I can’t take this anymore. It’s not the actual job it’s the people. They all know I’ve been suspended though it’s been kept quiet why. Off course it’s kind of obvious why it happened. I’ve worked with most of these people before and there used to seeing me drink.

            Why is it that people can’t help but make comments about me? Some are cruel others are harmless. Some don’t even have the courtesy to say it to my face. I can see people whispering, glancing at me every so often. I’m not stupid. I know there talking about me.

            Not only that, Mei has decided to glue herself by my side. I couldn’t even drink water without her tasting it first. It wouldn’t be so bad if I liked Mei but the truth is she kind of annoys me.

            I’m so stressed out right now. This is what caused me to drink in the first place. The constant pressure to reach the agents goals. You have to look right, speak right, act right. Everyone’s out for themselves and you can’t even trust the people who claim there your friends.

            So I drank as a coping mechanism. Then it became habit. It helped me through the day. It’s ten times worse now and I can’t even drink because that’s the very reason why it’s worse. I just want to go to a bar. I’ve never wanted to go to a bar so bad in my life.

            You’re supposed to call your sponsor when you feel like this but I don’t have one. They keep pressuring me to choose but I never did. I’m kind of regretting it now. I can’t call Aoi he needs to make a good impression at work. Ruki’s at work too. One of my sisters is at work, the other is never any help.

I can’t call  my parents. They don’t even know there’s anything up. Besides there more concerned with my homosexuality. They think it’s a phase I’m going through and want to help me move on. I don’t trust anyone else enough to call so I’m stuck here alone. I’m going to have to do this all by myself. Nothing scares me more.

~Kai’s POV~

            The best thing about being a chef in your own restaurant is you can choose exactly when you work. Being the boss is great. When people first meet me there surprised that I run the place. They expect someone more out spoken, more controlling less eager to please. However they soon realise I’m actually good at my job. I know exactly what needs to be done and how to do it. My staff are loyal and hard working as nobody wants to let poor Kai down. I’ve always believed being nice is the most rewarding.

            The phone rings as I’m putting the shopping away. It’s three in the afternoon and I’m hesitant to answer it. It’s probably just an advertiser. Then again it could be Aoi needing my help. I can’t ignore the phone just in case. When I promised I’d always be here for him I meant it.

            “Hello.” I say in the most neutral voice I can manage. Just in case it’s an advertiser.

            “Kai is that you? It’s Uruha.” Came the reply. Uruha? Why is he calling?

            “Aoi’s at work.” I remind him.

            “I know. I kind of wanted to talk to you.” Uruha responded surprising me.

            “Sure. You sound upset.” I comment carefully. Maybe this is just how Uruha sounds on the phone.

            “I am. I need someone to talk too. Everyone’s at work and then I remembered you.”

            “You’re lucky I wasn’t working the lunch shift.” I respond.

            “Can I trust you?” Uruha asks randomly.

            “Off course you can.” I reply.

            “I’m so stressed out with work. All I can think of is having a drink to calm my nerves.” Uruha says his voice filling with panic. “Can I come over? I know we don’t know each other very well and…”

            “Come over.” I order in my serious voice. This is the voice that I use to command respect at work. Nobody messes with me when I get serious. “I have about an hour before I have to leave for work. I’ll keep an eye on you.”

~Uruha’s POV~

            I’m a little calmer by the time I reach Aoi’s apartment. I call it Aoi’s apartment, because that’s how I think of it. I know Kai lives there too but it shall always be Aoi’s apartment in my head. I know Kai will help me. If I tell Kai my problems it should help. Right?  A problem shared is a problem halved. So they say. Does that mean I give half my problems to Kai? Or do they just vanish into thin air? I wouldn’t want to give Kai my stress. No it’s silly. Stress isn’t contagious. At least I don’t think it is.

            “Uruha, you’re shaking.” Kai commented as he opened the door. He looks so concerned and I know I made the right choice to ask for his help.

            “Am I?” I ask.

            “Yeah, a little.” Kai confirmed leading me firmly to the couch where he sits me down and gets me some tea. He looks so different when he isn’t smiling. Mature and serious. It makes him handsome but I prefer his smiling face. When he smiles he looks so happy you can’t help but be happy too.

            “Have you talked to Aoi recently?” I suddenly ask as Kai sits beside me. I know it’s out of the blue and has nothing to do with my problem but I kind of need to know.

            “Just a text this morning.” Kai responds. “Any reason?”

            “I kind of… there’s something I want him to keep secret. I wanted to know if he’d let anything slip.” I explain.

            “No. If you want it secret Aoi won’t even tell me. You can trust him, that’s what you want to know isn’t it?” Kai says. It’s like he can read my thoughts!

            “Yes. Well not really. I did want to know but that’s not why I’m stressed out.” I explain. I study Kai carefully. I find it so hard to trust people. Why is it with him I just know my secrets will be safe? Being with Kai has a calming effect and I tell him about my day. He just listens and somehow manages to say just the right things. I can understand now why Aoi likes him so much. Kai is the world’s nicest person and there’s not a single thing anyone can say or do to make me think otherwise.

            After what feels like no time at all Kai leaves for work. I’m calmer now but Kai seems reluctant to leave me. I refuse to let him miss work because of me and we both leave. I go home and take a bath like he suggested. If I weren’t so in love with Aoi I’d probably have feelings for Kai right now.

~Ruki’s POV~

            I arrive home from what should have been Uruha’s photo shoot. It’s for a cover of a fashion magazine. It’s one of those photo shoots that have an amazing affect on your career. I feel a little bad for Uruha. This should be his chance to shine. Still he lost it himself. I had nothing to do with that. It wasn’t like I was the one who’d told on him. So what if I asked after it once I knew Uruha was suspended. I went to see him first. Besides Uruha probably would have told me to go after it. Better to loose something like this to a friend right?

            I wish Uruha saw me as more than his friend. He’s amazing, beautiful, caring, funny. He’s perfect in bed. That’s the worst part. We’ve actually slept together. I’ve woken up beside him a few times but I knew it was a lie. It wasn’t Uruha making love to me. It was the alcohol. Uruha would sleep with anyone when he’s drunk. He only has to find you the slightest bit attractive.

            That’s another secret I’m keeping from Uruha. I wasn’t as drunk as he thought I was. I knew exactly what I was doing. All the alcohol did was relax me just enough that I’d put my feelings first.

            If I told anyone this they’d assume I’d feel guilty. I don’t. When Uruha gets like that he always ends up in bed. At least I’m there in the morning. He can trust me. I don’t steal from him. I don’t brag about my conquest. I’m there in the morning to comfort his tears. I’m doing him a favour by getting there first. That’s why I feel no guilt.

            I do care for Uruha. More than he could know. It breaks my heart to see him with other men. I can’t help but feel over whelming jealousy towards Aoi. What does he have that I don’t? But he does make Uruha happy. If he didn’t I wouldn’t put up with it at all.

~Aoi’s POV~

            I return home from work and have a quick dinner. I’m supposed to be going to a meeting tonight. I had to change times because of my job. No more hot man to stare at. Maybe there will be a new hot man. But it’s not the same. It’s Uruha I like to look at. Besides you’re not meant to be dating anyone in the meeting. Mine and Uruha’s was a forbidden love. Well not that forbidden. Had they found out one of us would have had to change meetings. So really they won if you think about it.

            I go to the meeting and it’s full of new faces. I chat casually with them afterwards while eating the biscuits. I love those free biscuits. There nothing special but there free. Being free always makes food taste better.

            The biscuits remind me of my promise to Uruha so I say good bye and head home. It will help both of us if Uruha learns how to cook.

            When I get home I remember Kai is at work. He’d not due back for a couple of hours. I could have stayed longer and eaten more free biscuits before the weight watcher organisers take over the room. Hey maybe if I eat enough free biscuits I could attend both meetings. Though I doubt weight watchers gives away free biscuits so what’s the point? Besides would Uruha love me if I got really fat? I know looks aren’t meant to be important but in reality they kind of are. You have to be attracted to someone for a relationship to work. Right?

            Off course Kai does eventually come home and I’m there to greet him. He’s instantly suspicious as I’m only waiting for him if I’m in trouble or I want something.

            “What do you want?” Kai asks with a sigh. I guess the grin gave away the fact I wasn’t in trouble.

            “Will you teach Uruha to cook?” I ask. No point playing games.

            “Sure.” Kai agrees with no argument. Well why would he argue? Helping people and cooking are his two greatest hobbies. I benefit greatly from both. “As long as he wants lessons.”

            “He does.” I confirm.

            “If he wants them so much why didn’t he ask me himself when he came over?” Kai asks suspiciously.

            “Maybe he felt weird asking you himself.” I say before my brain catches up. “Wait. He was here?”

            “Yeah. He was stressed out and you were at work.” Kai explains.

            “I should have called him.” I sigh. “If I knew he was stressed I would have. But I didn’t want to appear to be needy.”

            “I think he’s fine. We talked it out.” Kai explains.

            “At least you were here for him. Not like his stupid boyfriend.” I mutter grabbing my phone. I hope he’s not mad I didn’t call….